Love and Relationships: How do you know it’s love?

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Question: How do you know it’s love (not just “like”)?

Answer: This question is hard to give a broad answer too. Feelings for someone are so personal. Some can fall in love quickly, others take huge precautions against even muttering the word “love.” But, to me, loving someone has a few “warning signs” that are pretty steady on a case-by-case basis.

Gossip Girl

When you love someone, you don’t let their shortcomings bother you (too much). If you just “like” someone, an annoying habit or act could send you packing. If it’s love, you may still get annoyed, but you won’t let it affect your relationship. You accept that you too have shortcomings and you’re not the one to judge for theirs.

When you love someone, you’re truly proud of them. Their accomplishments make you feel just as happy as they make them feel. You want them to succeed, sometimes even above your own success.

When you love someone, you make sacrifices. This is a BIG ONE. To me, it’s one of the most key components of love and to a healthy relationship. When you just like someone, you probably won’t be willing to give much up for the other person’s happiness. You won’t see the value in passing up another hang out with your friends for that person or maybe you won’t stop flirting with other people because, hey man, it’s “your personality.” But if you love someone, you know that’s a big load of you-know-what. You’ll sacrifice your time for them. You’ll stop flirting with other people because you truly don’t want to. If they like to FaceTime and you’ve always preferred texting, you’ll sacrifice a bit of your comfort zone to FaceTime them every now and then. Love’s a game of give and takes, of compromise, of sacrifice, to make the person you love happy; just don’t lose yourself in the journey.

Love is still getting butterflies in your stomach every time you see them, even after being with them for a year and a half. Love is enjoying time with them, regardless of if you’re binge-watching Parks and Rec or traveling the world. Love is being a little less stubborn for the sake of both your happinesses.

But, there’s nothing wrong with just liking someone! Like can turn into love or it can disappear and lead you to true love later on. And, if you still don’t know if it’s like or love, there are always trusty Buzzfeed quizzes.

Your friend,

Maia Gibson

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